So, our lovely Editor, Jayne, offered me an idea for this article. What does comfort mean for you, what gives us comfort? She knows my process, I go away have a think, then… Well as has happened many times before, an article starts as one thing and becomes another, yet ultimately and not surprisingly, it is all connected and I love seeing where it goes without knowing where it will end up. Like life perhaps?!
Many things in life can give us comfort from a cheeky chocolate bar, a cosy blanket and a favourite film on a cold rainy evening, a warm wool jacket on a brisk walk on a frosty morning, a cuddle with your doting pet to a friend sliding a cappuccino carefully in front of you whilst you scribble away at your debut book.
Looking beyond these little life luxuries I believe real comfort for me is being comfortable in your own skin, a knowing that you are okay, as you are in this moment, regardless of the judgement of others.
Being a lady with only a few months of her fantastic fifties left it is lovely to have earned that feeling. It feels like it took me a while to get there but eventually I agreed with myself “Who needs the opinions and judgements of others ruling your life? Really!”
One day I shall sit and reflect upon my life, The loves, the joys, the sorrows and the strife.
I will remember those long roads travelled in despair, Life that’s full of great love, laughter, without a care.
The people I have met and friendships made anew, The sadness of great loss and partings I went through.
The babies I held in my arms as they went to sleep, The passion and love of a heart that’s true, to keep.
A child’s spontaneous smile, a loved one’s kiss, A life lived well, troubles, smiles, fears, dreams, it’s all of this.
So when I have had my time, looked at all I’ve been through, There will be contentment there, my friend, it’s true.
When all my passions and struggles are laid side by side, I will have been blessed and have nothing there to hide.
So if you take some time your life to review, And feel that treasured moments are too few, Search for something good amongst the mess,
Something small that you can hold onto and bless, And simply remember, never forget, That life is for living with no regret.
©Patricia McDowall (20/02/2016)
That doesn’t mean I go blindly ignoring everyone else’s point of view, quite the reverse but it does mean that I value my own opinion and choices in life and take responsibility for them and stand in the power of who I am with them at that moment of time. It’s very liberating.
Being okay with YOU is a great comfort through life but how do we get to this point of indifference to the judgement of the outside world without losing our connection and compassion? If we get it wrong doesn’t that leave us just as seemingly selfish souls?
I believe it is all about standing in our power with a passionate heart. Melding our spirit and our physical being together, living life with passion, com passion, knowing what your passions are and working with them. Becoming You. Then sitting with that and allowing you to change, grow and evolve through your life experiences without worrying what others will think. They are doing the same too hopefully and so it is a realisation that we are to live OUR own lives and be comfortable in our own skin and of course, as we are all connected, helping each other to achieve this wonderful comfortable feeling as well. Acknowledging and appreciating the true self in all human beings.
That is what we are here to find out about through our experiences. Find out about what makes us feel alive, what makes the juices of creativity flow and what talents we have come with to use in service to the world expressing ourselves fully through experiences we have every day.
Finding your passions and where you ‘fit in’ from your own soul perspective can seem taxing. There seems to be a vast openness to the question “What is it that I love?” and then a gap in knowing how to transfer that into some semblance of doing that thing you love in your everyday life and creating it in such a way that brings fulfilment and offering it in service to the world.
The place to start though is to know you have come to do something that can only be done by you in the way YOU will do it, simply because there is no other like you in the world. How marvellous is that! Just take a moment, only you can do what you have come to do in the way YOU can do it.
Secondly you already have the skills deep within you that will enable you to do what you love, what you are passionate about.
These two ideas are the starting point, it is within you already. Usually it has something to do with what you are drawn to that gives you that feeling of comfort, enjoyment, uplifts you. You can develop ideas by becoming aware of your feelings when you are happiest and write down these passions. Then develop how you can integrate them into your life more. Maybe create a side business out of a hobby. Volunteer in the realm you are interested in. Maybe shift some of your time into doing what you enjoy more and make new connections. If you enjoy dog walking then start a dog walking round then maybe create a business from it. There are all sorts of ideas but it starts with your passions and that feeling of comfort and joy.
So why is it so important to explore these passions and why now? Well, it is about living life to the full, creating your best life, when change comes along, taking it and seeing it as an opportunity, divine timing saying to you to have a look at your life and is there something you are passionate about which you haven’t started yet?
Now is important because there is only now, this moment. The past was preparation for now, you learned what you wanted and what you didn’t. The future is for you to create in the now.
Life offers us constraints at the moment and so it feels as if we cannot live life to the full but we have been given an opportunity to sit and be and review our lives and the way we interact with our world. It is quite amazing if you stop for a moment, it is hard to comprehend this wonderful globe with its billions of people, animals, oceans, forests and plants, all of it spinning around in our solar system as part of the vast Universe.
We are part of that natural consciousness. We are much more than what we think we are, we are capable of creating so much more beauty in the world and we start by being comfortable with us, you and me and simply letting our gifts ripple outwards, working together to create something marvellous.
All of your experiences count, all of them, but the saddest experience of all is not living your passions and denying the world the full expression of you being comfortable in your own skin. Allow this awakening within you to begin. Then when your days are done and your soul goes back home with your mission complete, then you will know true comfort, the comfort of being you, expressing you and having lived with No Regret.
Author, Spiritual Teacher and More to Life Elder