The distinct music and voices of the Beatles fill the air and cajole us to happily sing along, even though it’s only 7.30 in the morning. My husband was still in bed and I had planned to wake him up with this famous tune and a pretty Valentine’s Day card. A big smile of appreciation came my way, and when he showed me his card for me, SURPRISE! It had the same message as mine, ‘I love you to the Moon and back’. We laughed at the sight and felt happy that both of us shared the same sentiment. To top up the feel-good- factor, I then played one of my favourite mood- boosting songs, written and sung by George Harrison, ’Here Comes the Sun’.
What a way to start the day, I thought, and why can’t we do this every day?
Two weeks earlier, my older granddaughter, aged 12, told me how much she was looking forward to Valentine’s Day. For the first time in her young life, the day would be very special, as she knew that a lovely boy from school would celebrate it with her. She had already bought him a card and a present and she was hugely excited about it all. Being a sensitive and observant girl, she noticed that I held back on my enthusiasm.
“Do you like Valentine’s Day?” she asked me carefully.
Not wanting to spoil her fun, I had to quickly think of an acceptable response. “Well, I have mixed feelings.” I said carefully, so as not to upset her newly- found feelings in any way. “I’m very happy when Grandpa gives me a card or flowers, or even a small gift. I’m also very happy for all those who have a good experience on that day, those who have someone to love and cherish and who receive the same love back in return. But then, I also think of those who don’t have anybody to love and might feel even more lonely and upset on that day, with all the fuss that is made commercially, in shops and in their window displays, and so on. It can get a little tricky.”
She looked at me, and I could see that she was thinking about what this loneliness may feel like. “I’ve never thought about it in this way, Omi, (German for ‘Nana’), it must be very hard to be alone, especially when other people are happy and enjoying themselves.”
“Still, it can be a wonderful celebration of love, and I’m so happy for you that there will be a special person to enjoy the day with,” I said to cheer us both up. We looked at each other smilingly, and I breathed a sigh of relief that the conversation had worked out well. There was no way that I could tell her where my objections to this particular day, the 14th February, came from. It would have been irresponsible.
After arriving back home that evening, I sat down quietly and thought about my experience of another Valentine’s Day some years ago, when I was on a thanks-giving pilgrimage in Chartres, France. I had just launched my documentary ‘Chartres Cathedral – A Sacred Geometry’ and felt grateful to the heavens that it had been so well-received.
The noisy crowds outside the cathedral, even on a dark, glum and drizzly day, clearly demonstrated the popularity of this sacred place. All around me, the animated sounds of a multitude of languages could be heard. I stood outside the Main Entrance, admiring the work of all the talented, anonymous stone masons, who had adorned the building with beautiful geometric patterns, statues of saints and celestial beings. Above the Royal Portal, looking down on us with his right hand in blessing, is a beautiful statue of Christ, seated on a throne, surrounded by the symbols of the evangelists; a winged man for St Matthew, a lion for St. Mark, a bull for St Luke and an eagle for St John. And above, at a great height, a statue of the one who inspired the construction of the cathedral, the Virgin Mary.
I was in a meditative state and felt transported to the ‘Heavenly Jerusalem’ for a brief moment in time.
Then came a sudden shift in energy, a commotion, screams, and a dull sound of something hitting the ground. It all happened so quickly and only a few yards away from me. I moved closer to see what had happened. People were yelling, screaming and crying all around me. Someone had climbed up to one of the towers and jumped. Nobody could get to them to help, as the cathedral is protected at this point by a tall cast-iron fence and only cathedral staff could get into that space. I saw a body lying on the floor. I quickly stepped away and sat down on the ground, praying for the soul that had just ended its life on Valentine’s Day.
The Police and an ambulance arrived, but it was too late.
Later, I learned that a nineteen-year-old French girl had jumped to her death because of a broken heart. I was shaken and tearful at the news. Nobody should feel this despairing, I thought, what a tragedy. Could it have been avoided? Was there no-one she could turn to for help?
I couldn’t help thinking that if we’re all keeping our hearts, eyes and ears open to spot someone in such a crisis, at least some situations like this could surely be avoided.
Now you know why I couldn’t tell my granddaughter the whole truth about my reservations. She had a wonderful Valentine’s Day, and I wish her and all loving beings on this planet, for evermore, a good experience, every day filled with love.
All You Need is Love! This is what it all boils down to. Where there is love, there is compassion, understanding and kindness! May this love never be in short supply in your life!
Louise Illig-Mooncie
Author and More to Life Elder
