This is an interesting subject to write about as I myself am coming out of a period of intense self-care which has been essential for my physical, emotional and energetic well-being.
I’m aware ‘self-care’ gets touted as a ‘buzz word’ in the spiritual community, but what does it actually mean?
There’s a perception it’s about meditation, retreating and all things Zen and while in some cases this is true, it’s a little bit more than that. It’s about taking the time to put yourself first and that concept alone can trip many people at the first hurdle.
How many of us have been taught to believe that putting ourself first is selfish? – that you should place others before yourself? Or that in order to be a ‘good person’ you do everything for others first. Can I say this is an outdated form of control and manipulation and is simply not true in this day and age?
Spirituality is not about sacrifice or suffering. And hasn’t been for a long time.
If the thought of making time for yourself causes you to pause or feel uncomfortable, let me phrase it in a way that may resonate more.
Do you have a car that you get serviced each year? It’s a way of sense checking all is as it should be and preventing any break downs a bit further down the line saving you time and money.
Self care is the same concept but YOU are the car.
When you are not at your best, or are running on fumes, how will you be able to help anyone else If you have nothing to give? Who or what does that serve?
When you are able to take time for self-maintenance or self-care to ensure your energy is in balance, and that you are rested and refreshed, you are able to help more people.
It’s a win/win scenario.
This is what we term as self-care:
Taking the time to find what helps you to ground, to feel connected and to hear your inner guidance.
Being able to slow down, rest and recharge your internal batteries.
Remembering who you are.
Spotting areas where you may be out of balance and doing something to rectify it – thus preventing an issue further down the line.
Being in nature, turning off electronic devices, taking a break from social media are all excellent examples. And I highly recommend doing them. Frequently.
But what happens when these times of self-care go that bit deeper?
I asked my ‘team’ what they would like to talk about in this article, I was given the term ‘Soul Care’. I asked how this differs from self-care and their swift reply, which I could already sense at a deeper level was
“It differs in that these are the actions you take to change that which hurts your Soul and your progression.”
I’ve sat with this for a few days and can see exactly what they are referring to.
Now, you may or may not be aware (my business name may give it away) that I work with various different energies and the loudest, or should I say most predominant is Dragon energy. It’s not for the faint hearted, but for those who wish to make definite changes in their life.
Spoken by one who knows only too well of what she speaks.
These Soul care moments/times are essentially the bigger or deeper questions we ask ourselves in times of introspection, space and self-care. What makes me happy? What changes do I need to make? And where am I headed?
Sometimes the answers or responses that pop-up are less than palatable and refer to many subjects; one sided relationships in your life, a job that drains your spirit or makes you deeply unhappy; people who you know are not good for you but you still remain connected to name a few.
This is crossing into Soul Care. Can you feel the difference?
I have learned so much about myself, about others and about the collective energies and learning how to pick them all apart to make more sense of them. Dragon energy in particular has guided me through these waters and given me many tools along the way, including remembering my own inner strength and voice.
I’ll be blunt. These times can be uncomfortable, unpleasant, exhausting and very difficult. But they are so worth the effort.
They are steps towards your own self-empowerment and autonomy. You start taking responsibility for your life, your choices and your reactions and realising you always had that responsibility but may have been avoiding making eye contact with it, handing it over to someone else or simply been in denial.
This is an important skill-set for everyone.
Take the time to ask the hard questions, they get easier to ask over time! Start to be able to see what is sat right in front of you and may have been for quite some time. Start to see the repeating patterns in your life and saying “enough is enough, this is going to change”. And then take the first step. Or simply say “no” – the strongest, most powerful word and energy you possess. Don’t be scared to wield it.
Last month I retreated from all my energy and public work. I was exhausted and needed to recharge but also, I was aware of a demanding and grasping energy that was trying very hard to attach to mine. The answer from myself and my team was a flat out “no”, in fact, a “Hell No!”
We took the time to check my boundaries, check my energy and my online areas to see where this energy was attempting to get in. The work was done in the background while I had space to sense, check and dig in. Thankfully, that energy is now long gone and I’ve had confirmation that everything has changed – so much so, that I can step back in to the work again.
So, whilst at the start of this piece I said I was in a period of intense self-care, it was actually intense soul-care.
So, whether you are practising Self-Care or Soul Care, always remember to take the time you need when you need it, return to a balanced, centred and calm place and if you need to say ‘no’ to something or someone, then do it. If 2020 has shown us anything it’s the importance of looking after ourselves.